Getting healthy and taking control of my weight has been a really big deal for me this week, obviously, since it is all I can seem to talk about. I don't think that is the worst thing in the world though. I'm one of those people who can get really obsessive and passionate about things. Some things that I've gone overboard with in the past (and present):
Getting pregnant (took a hella long time)
My friends' weddings
I'm sure I can think of a few more, but when I really, and I mean REALLY put my mind to something, I don't quit until it is perfect and complete. Probably what makes me a good marketer. I kept wondering why I can't get obsessive about losing weight, so yeah, I'm going overboard.
I started writing a more detailed blog called Starting Over: Getting My Life Back on the WeightWatchers website to really document my experience and the day to day struggles with being on the program (stuff that I don't want to bore you with on Mixed Bag of Rant). I made the decision yesterday to start physically going to meetings and weigh in (in front of another human... GAH). I am in dire need of accountability and have finally admitted to myself that I cannot do this alone. I need the support. I need to be surrounded by people just like me. With the same story. I blogged about my decision to start meetings and I got a comment from someone who said,
"As I was reading your post, I was amazed at how much your story sounds just like mine. I haven't even told my husband what my weight loss plans are as I am afraid he will react in the same manner but I need a change. I only signed up for the online option of Weight Watchers so I am very interested in knowing how your meeting goes."
Then, I had a friend request from someone who said they decided to go to meetings because I inspired them. I inspired someone? For real? Now I really feel like I need to follow through with my words and my promises to myself- other people are looking to me for inspiration. They want to know they are not alone. They want to know we can do this, and do it together. Isn't it amazing how incredibly powerful your words can be? And here I thought they were just my thoughts barfed out on the computer screen.
I'm not sure what has inspired me to live a more healthy lifestyle. Sure, I read success stories, but they all say: "*Results not typical". How can I be inspired by that? What if I'm the one that is just typical and I will never achieve great results? So, I look to other things to remind me of why I need to take this journey.
Pictures: College pictures of me are skinny and cute. I avoid pictures now at all costs.
Words: A boy that called me "thunder thighs" in gym class when I was 13.
Shopping: The ability to walk into any clothing store and buy anything I want.
Health: I worry that the weight will eventually start affecting my overall health.
Energy: To chase around my toddler and run just as much as he does.
Freedom: The ability to not feel like what I look like will hold me back. From anything.
Self-Image: I want to go to the cabin or on vacation without that self-conscious feeling.
My long-term goal goes out for an entire year, so I have a long road ahead of me. If after a year I have learned how to make healthy eating decisions and have a regular workout schedule, then regardless of whether or not I lose weight, I'll have made significant changes in my life for the better. I have a good feeling that I'll be a hot mama by the time 2012 rolls around though.
I know many of you have made some New Year's Resolutions. What inspires you?